Getting to Know Your Mother

I know, I know. You were just hoping I would continue talking about her. Well, all of three people asked me to write about ideas for getting to know their Blessed Mother. So I am assuming all of the internet is dying for my advice as well. So here are a few ideas if you aren't used to the Catholic idea of having a relationship with Mary. Or if you love the idea but haven't actually fostered that relationship you intellectually know is so important.

Theology for Beginners and Birthing from Within. Both required reading in this household. 

Books
Obviously, you can read about her and read about what the Church teaches in regards to her.  A few of my favorites:

Walking With Mary by Edward Sri. This is the most recent one I've read and I just loved it. Very easy to read and full of information. He breaks down tons of passages in Scripture that speak of Mary and goes into detail about what they mean. I learned a lot.

Hail, Holy Queen by Scott Hahn. I read this one several years ago and can't remember a lot of what I learned. (I'm really smart like that.) But I remember loving it. And I even got it signed by Scott Hahn himself. So that made it extra good.

The The Reed of God by Caryll Houselander.  I read this with an online book club and loved, loved, loved it. I think I highlighted more sentences than I left alone. I made notes in the margins that just said, "WOW!!!" Definitely one I should read again.

The New Rosary in Scripture: Biblical Insights for Praying the 20 Mysteries by Edward Sri. Ted read this one, not me. So I can't speak on it other than to say that he liked it. But I'm sure it would be a great place to start if you want to learn more about  how praying the rosary is to really immerse yourself in scripture! Hence the title.

Marian Thoughts by Pope Benedict. A blogger friend sent me this and it's great for a quick quote from our wonderful (former) Holy Father on his wonderful Blessed Mother.

33 Days to Morning Glory by Fr. Michael Gaitley I haven't read this one yet, but it's the tip top of my Amazon wish list. Even before a dustbuster and meatloaf pan. Everyone who has read it has loved it. It's a do-it-yourself Marian retreat that helps prepare you for a Marian consecration. I must, must, must do this.

True Devotion to Mary by St. Louis de Montfort. I saved the best for last. But again, I haven't read this one. I know! It's only thee single greatest and most loved book about Mary ever written. And I haven't read it. I hang my head in shame and admit that, yes, I should change my blog's title. I've tried to read it! Really I have! But I guess I'm just not quite smart enough because a lot of it goes over my head. I do NOT recommend this book if you are just dipping your toes into the water with Mary. You should probably read every other one on the list before coming to this. Unless you're a lot smarter than me. Then go for it.

Images
We have lots of images of Mary around the house. Seeing her on our walls and fridge and in picture frames helps me to think about her on a daily basis and (sometimes) say a little intercessory prayer for her help to get me through the daily trials of motherhood. If the idea of putting up an image of Mary in your home is too much right now, why not try an image of her and Jesus together? This one is my personal favorite.

Just print it offline and stick it on the fridge. It doesn't have to be fancy. Or send me your address and I'll make you one of the million holy cards I have with other images. Try stopping just for a few seconds in the middle of your day and center yourself on the peace and profound love displayed in that image. A vulnerable Baby. A loving Mother. Holding God Himself in her very arms. Think about holding your own babies with the same embrace and trying to love them with the love Mary had for Jesus.

Statues
We have a total of five Mary statues inside our three bedroom home, which makes us seem super Catholic I suppose. All of them have been gifts and I treasure each one. But if the idea of displaying a statue of Mary is too much, too fast, then what about just leaving your nativity scene out even after Christmas has passed? If you're comfortable displaying a statue of Mary holding or adoring the Baby Jesus in December, wouldn't it be ok to keep it out all year round? This beautiful pair sits on our dresser. I promise I'm going to glue Joseph's head back on one of these days.

And no, Catholics do not worship statues.

Media Resources
One thing that Ted and I have really been doing a lot of lately is listening to podcasts. I wish we had more time and energy to read but we just don't right now. That's why it's so nice to be able to listen to Catholic radio in the car or online. We pull up a podcast just before bed and listen to it together if we can manage to keep our eyes open.

Catholic Answers is a really good one. They have a whole section devoted to Mary.

Lighthouse Catholic Media is another awesome resource. They're the ones who put out all the CDs that can be found in the back of a lot of Catholic churches. Check the back or your local church to see if they have the kiosk. They ask for a $3 donation but if you don't have it, you are still welcome to take a CD. I haven't heard a bad one yet. You can buy a CD for just a few dollars. You can also get MP3 versions for even cheaper. Here's the link to all of their talks on Mary.

You can download an awesome Fulton Sheen app on your phone for free and listen to tons of talks from this great teacher of the Faith. There's even a section devoted to Mary to make it easy for you.

Bonnie, a big fan of Sheen, also has a her own short video with lots of simple ideas for developing a relationship with Mary.

Marian Miracles
If you really want to be wowed by Mary, spend some time learning about the miraculous events that have taken place throughout history. The Miracle of the Sun in Fatima is a favorite of many but there are so many more. And when Mary appeared to Juan Diego in 1531, she left behind a most miraculous image of herself.

Good ole Catholic Answers has several radio podcasts you can listen to on the topic of Marian apparitions if you want to know more. I'm sure there are tons of other great resources on this area, but I'm a bit fuzzy here. If anyone knows more please leave them in the comments!

Marian Prayers
Catholics get a lot of flack for their love of scripted prayers. But it's not that we can't talk to God using our own words, it's just that sometimes the words aren't there. Or sometimes someone else said it better than you can. Just as a Protestant might recite the Our Father when other words escape them, Catholics can fall back on any of the numerous prayers written throughout history. And it seems to me that some people who bash Catholics for scripted prayer, fall into the habit of saying their own version of scripted prayer anyway. "Lord we just thank you for this day. Please bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies. Please bless the hands that prepared it. In Jesus name we pray." I'm not making fun, promise. Just pointing out that it's nice to not have to come up with your own words every single time you want to pray. Marian prayers are different from prayers written directly to any member of the Trinity as we are asking her intercession to the Triune God with the words of the prayer.

My personal favorite is the Memorare.

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thine intercession was left unaided.

Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me.

I also like to use the words from the Gospel of Luke that Mary herself used to praise God when I'm praying. 

My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord,
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior
for he has looked with favor on his lowly servant.
From this day all generations will call me blessed:
the Almighty has done great things for me,
and holy is his Name.

He has mercy on those who fear him
in every generation.
He has shown the strength of his arm,
he has scattered the proud in their conceit.

He has cast down the mighty from their thrones,
and has lifted up the lowly.
He has filled the hungry with good things,
and the rich he has sent away empty.

He has come to the help of his servant Israel
for he remembered his promise of mercy,
the promise he made to our fathers,
to Abraham and his children forever. 

You can find a bunch more here.

The Many Names of Mary
Having been Catholic my whole life, I've never really thought it odd that there are so many names for Mary. But I can totally understand how, from a non-Catholic perspective, we sound a little crazy. "That's Our Lady of Guadalupe. Oh look at this picture of Our Lady of Sorrows. I just love this statue of Our Lady of Grace." I like this explanation. Or this one. If you haven't found a relationship with Mary to be something that comes easily, try praying the Litany of Mary and seeing if one of her titles jumps out at you. Maybe she can be your Model of Motherhood, your Virgin Most Wise, or your Queen of Peace.



So there you have it. A not-at-all exhaustive list about getting to know your Mama Mary. Please, please, please leave other ideas in the comments! I'd like to put this post on my sidebar in hopes that it could maybe help those struggling with the concept of a Marian devotion and would love to have your input. And if none of this appeals to you, you can always start by just repeating those famous words spoken by the Angel Gabriel, Hail, full of grace....

Quick Takes: Luther, Christmas Cards and Dol Jan Chi

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After writing this post, I did a little digging on what Martin Luther taught about Mary. I had always heard he upheld the Church's teachings on Mary and had a great devotion to her. Boy did he ever.

The veneration of Mary is inscribed in the very depths of the human heart. -Sermon, September 1, 1522

[She is the] highest woman and the noblest gem in Christianity after Christ . . . She is nobility, wisdom, and holiness personified. We can never honor her enough. Still honor and praise must be given to her in such a way as to injure neither Christ nor the Scriptures. -Sermon, Christmas, 1531 [emphasis mine]

One should honor Mary as she herself wished and as she expressed it in the Magnificat. She praised God for his deeds. How then can we praise her? The true honor of Mary is the honor of God, the praise of God's grace . . . Mary is nothing for the sake of herself, but for the sake of Christ . . . Mary does not wish that we come to her, but through her to God. -Explanation of the Magnificat, 1521

Christ, our Savior, was the real and natural fruit of Mary's virginal womb . . . This was without the cooperation of a man, and she remained a virgin after that.
-Luther's Works, Sermons on John, chaps. 1-4 (1539)


Those are really beautiful words written about Our Lady. If I had heard them without knowing who said them, I could have probably guessed they were from the Pope or Scott Hahn or someone. I genuinely wonder how the reverence and honor that Luther showed to Mary has become practically extinct in Protestant belief today.  Anybody care to shed some light on that for me?

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Some Christmas card picture outtakes. The first, Overly Concerned Sister.

I call this one, Stupid Cat.

And my personal favorite, Achoo.

These were all taken before I realized I had forgotten my sweater. I put it on for the rest so we could pretend like it's actually cold here. But it's been in the 70s and 80s all week. Don't hate me. Just come visit!

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Despite what the outtakes may have you believe, we did manage to snag one decent picture that is going to make the most beautiful card. I did the (very, very, very) simple design myself with Picasa and uploaded it to VistaPrint. Way cheaper than using their designs. And with the Groupon I bought, we'll be getting 100 gorgeous Christmas cards for only 28 dollars. Except that I waited until now to order them and have to pay 20 bucks for shipping. Still a good deal, but ouch.

This is only the second year we've sent out Christmas cards and last year I did my best to keep it a secret. I'm so worried about hurting someone's feelings who doesn't get a card. But the truth is, we both have huge families and are blessed with lots of far away friends from our time spent in Missouri and Mississippi. Plus friends from all over the country through this blog. Not to mention our awesome community here in Florida. So 100 cards goes pretty quickly and there are lot of people that have to get left off the list. I know it's a good problem to have but I hate it. But we can't buy 200 cards so it is what it is. I still love getting cards from people who I don't send one to and hope that no one reading is hurt if they don't get a card. Surely I'm not the only one who stresses about this right?

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This wasn't from this week, but I still have to share.

Me: Today is the Feast of St. Andrew. He was a fisherman!
Hannah: He went fishing with Mary!
Me: Well......maybe.
H: Saints are people who live in heaven. We ask them to pray for us!
Me: That's right!
H: God is in heaven. He's so so so up high. 
Me: And Does God love you so much?
H: He does love me so much!
Me: And does he love Paul too?
H: No. No He doesn't love Paul.

That's not true Paul. Everybody loves you.

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Our tree went up the first day of Advent. I try to act like I understand people who wait until Christmas to do their tree, but really I just can't imagine going without. The smell it fills the entire house with, the calmness and warmth the lights bring to the dark evenings and mornings, the sentimental feeling each ornament gives as I bark at Hannah to get her hands off before she breaks it.

Oh Christmas tree.

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Today is my one and only nephew's first birthday! My brother-in-law (Ted's sister's husband) is from South Korea and they celebrated the traditional Dol Jan Chi for Theo's first birthday. Isn't he totes adorbs? (No, you will never, ever find that expression on this blog. Ever.) 

Isn't he precious? We didn't get to make it to St. Louis for the party but I do get to see the little prince in just a few weeks. I can't wait for him and Paul to wrestle.

Happy Birthday Theo!

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Since I'm a few days late in posting these quick takes, I get to wish you all a most blessed Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Forgive me if I end with just one more quote about Mary?

It is a sweet and pious belief that the infusion of Mary's soul was effected without original sin; so that in the very infusion of her soul she was also purified from original sin and adorned with God's gifts, receiving a pure soul infused by God; thus from the first moment she began to live she was free from all sin"

Yep. Still from Luther.  From a Sermon entitled, "On the Day of the Conception of the Mother of God" in 1527. Ok, I'm done. Promise.

Head to Jen for more.

Oh, I almost forgot! Do I have any readers that live in Arkansas?? Particularly near Fayetteville? If so, email me! I have quite the treat for you.

Behold, Your Mother

Do you know her? Your mother. The Blessed Virgin Mary. The mother of your Lord. Do you know her?

I've been in a blogging rut for quite some time and I think I finally know why. It became very clear to me while at a concert last night that I have been failing in my duty and mission to tell you, each and every one of you, about your mom. Yes, I know the title of this blog is named for Mary. Yes, I've written about her many times. But I've never really told you about her. I've never invited you to know her like I know her. I've shied away from it because I was scared. Nervous. Overwhelmed. Inadequate. You name it. I've wanted to write this post for four years but couldn't muster up the courage. What if I get a theological detail wrong? What if I can't answer the questions that people might ask? I'm not a theologian. And while I do read books and listen to talks about our lady, I can't ever seem to retain that information and spit it back out when I need to.

So I keep quiet.

And I don't talk about how much I love her.

Or invite you to fall in love with her too.

But here goes.

Ted surprised me with tickets to a Matt Maher and Audrey Assad concert last night. (Are they coming to your city? Go, go go!) It was at a local Baptist church that holds a Christmas concert every year around this time. Because both of those artists are Catholic, there was a huge crowd from the Catholic Student Union, local Catholic youth groups, and regular Florida Catholics like us. Plus lots of Baptists that belong to that church. Plus lots of other Christians in town that heard about the concert from local Christian radio. It was so beautiful to have people of so many different faiths in one location praising Jesus and singing Christmas carols together.

As a friend said, Audrey "sings flawlessly, effortlessly, like I what I imagine Heaven will sound like." She sang a song I had heard before but never really listened to. Gabriel's Message. The lyrics were the words the angel Gabriel spoke to Mary when he announced the coming of our Lord. Straight from scripture. Right out of the gospel of Luke.

The angel Gabriel from Heaven came

His wings as drifted snow, his eyes as flame; 

"All hail", said he, "Thou lowly maiden Mary,"

Most highly favoured lady, Gloria!

"For known a blessed Mother thou shalt be,

All generations laud and honour thee,

Thy Son shall be Emmanuel, by seers foretold,

Most highly favoured lady," Gloria!

Then gentle Mary meekly bowed her head,

"To me be as it pleaseth God," she said,

"My soul shall laud and magnify his holy name,"

Most highly favoured lady, Gloria!

It was beautiful. And powerful. And then, she told us that she was going to sing the same song again, only in Latin. And Matt Maher started playing the piano and the music sent chills up my spine. He was playing the interlude to Ave Maria. I've been Catholic my whole life and had no idea what the words to Ave Maria actually were. Then, in that Baptist church, Audrey Assad and Matt Maher performed the most beautiful version of this ancient song I had ever heard. Not a song worshipping Mary, as so many Baptists mistakenly believe we do. But a song remembering her pivotal role in bringing us our King. Remembering her heroic "yes" to God and His will for her life. Remembering the promise that all generations would call her blessed! We praised God with the same words that Mary used to praise Him. My soul shall laud and magnify His holy name.

And I just cried. Tears rolling down my cheeks. Because it hit me that so many of my friends and family don't know her. Don't know their mother. And I was overcome with this desire to tell you about her.

Why is it so crazy to believe that we can't go to Jesus in the same way He came to us? Through His mother. Why can't we love and honor and cherish this beautiful woman who our Lord loves so much? If God is our Father and Jesus our Brother, why do we reject His mother as our mother? Do you think that loving Mary could in any way diminish your love for Jesus? As if the respect and love I give my own mother-in-law could somehow make my husband jealous? Or hurt? Never.

Please, don't let some mistaken preacher who espouses false teachings about the Catholic Church's love for Mary keep you from knowing your mother. Don't let fallen away Catholics be your example for the role of Mary in your own life. Don't let what you might think of as "praying" to Mary, keep you from asking your mom for help. Asking your mom to be with you on this journey to Jesus.

I love my son. I think he is the most beautiful and wonderful little boy who has ever graced this planet. I would do anything to keep him from harm. I would lay down my life without question to keep him safe. And I know that there will never be another human being who will love him as much as I do. I see it in the relationship Ted and his mom have. I love my husband, but she loves him more. She always will. He's her baby and her only son and she is absolutely smitten with the 27 year old man who towers above her, beats her in tennis, and makes her laugh harder than anyone else can. She loves him like nobody else can love him.

If Mary loves Jesus even half as much as I love Paul and my mother-in-law loves Ted, then she most definitely loves Him more than any one of us. More than any saint who has ever lived. More than any priest or preacher or pope. She loves Him with a mother's love. Why not let her show us how to love Jesus? Why not ask her to help us love Him better? When Ted and I were first married I called my mother-in-law to get his favorite cake recipe so I could make it for his birthday. I went to her to help me love my own husband. And I loved him in the same way she had done for so many years. I didn't venture out on my own and decide to make a different cake. I sought the help of his mother.

Jesus wants us to ask His mother for help. He wants us to love and honor and cherish her just as He did. She's not just another Biblical figure like Ester or Ruth or Martha. She is the mother of our God. If we can strive to imitate these other beautiful women in the Bible, then surely we can strive to imitate the life of Jesus' own mother.

Please, ask Mary what kind of relationship she wants to have with you. Talk to her in your heart and open yourself up to the possibility that she wants to be your mother. If that freaks you out, then ask Jesus instead. Ask Him if He wants you to honor His mother. To take seriously the commandment to honor your father and mother and include His mother in that command. How could He say no? How could He not want you to love her and accept her prayers and her help.

I don't have all the answers for every misconception that exists about Mary. I can't perfectly explain Her role in the Church despite my belief in it. But I love her. And I know how much my love for her has helped me love Jesus. And it very literally brought me to tears knowing that so many of you might not love her. And even more, than you might not know of her love for you.

I couldn't help but think that some of the Baptists at the concert last night were moved to consider Mary in a new light after learning about the Ave Maria and seeing these two very Christian artists sing it in their church. I couldn't help but have hope that you might see her in a new light too. She's more than a statue in a nativity scene. More than a character that Protestants talk about once a year at Christmas time. I don't keep it a secret that I wish the whole world was Catholic. I wish everyone knew the power and purpose of the Church Christ established 2000 years ago. I wish everyone could experience the healing salve of confession and look to the saints in times of trouble. I wish everyone would really and honestly reflect on Jesus' command to eat His body and drink His blood and then receive Him every Sunday in the Eucharist. But more than any of these, I wish everyone would know His mother.

She's your mom. Do you know her? Behold, your mother. (John 19:27)

Snippets of Thanks

Once again, our good friends spent Thanksgiving with us and made it one of the most delightful days of the year. We got smart and did canned corn instead of slow cooked green beans and frozen rolls instead of made from scratch. But the turkey, sweet potatoes, cornbread, and pumpkin pie were full of effort and deliciousness while being free of gluten and dairy. So I'm thankful for that. So very thankful for that.

Blurry Paul is thankful for PBR.

My retreat last weekend was just what the doctor ordered. If the doctor is my soul and the retreat is the saving grace I desperately needed to get me out of the rut that had taken over my prayer life. I had lots of time to read, pray in the chapel, and listen to wonderful talks on topics ranging from apostolic succession to Mary's role as our mother. The priest guided us through the most beautiful lectio divina of the story of the prodigal son. I admit, when he said what we would be doing I kind of made a sour face. I've just head the story so many times and listened to so many homilies on it, ya know? What cold I possibly learn from it again? But that's the thing about scripture. It's always fresh. Always new. Even though it ancient and unchanging. Halfway through I was moved to tears. I'll never hear the story the same way again. Thankful. Most definitely thankful for the retreat. And the Church. And Her wisdom in administering the sacraments to us. And for confession. Sweet, glorious, wonderful hour long confession. I could go on and on. Just thankful to be Catholic.

I grabbed my phone to see if I had pictures worth sharing and was met with about a dozen of these beauties.

I'm thankful for this girl and her mad camera skills.

And for these shopping carts.

And to Bass Pro for all their freeness. Free Santa. Free coloring sheets. Free kid crafts. And free viewing of "bid boodill" (big bluegill) which are actually largemouth bass.

And for the two minutes of peace and quiet that Bear's New Friend gets me.

I'm thankful that Advent starts Sunday!!!! I might just pull the liturgical day card and claim it's Advent in our household at 4:00 Saturday afternoon. I'm so ready for the season. So thankful for the overwhelming smell of pine needles wafting in our garage right now as we wait to bring our tree in tomorrow evening. Tonight during prayers Hannah thanked Jesus for Christmas trees. She knows what's up.

Ted is pulling the St. Andrew's feast day card and spending the day fishing on the coast tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be thankful for the yummy catch he'll bring home.

Thankful for you, the readers of this blog. Even more thankful for the commentors who give me little tokens of happiness throughout the day.

And for family, friends, the roof over my head. Ya know, all the important stuff.

Quick Takes: Retreat, Lake Getaway, and Nerdy Catholic Links

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Isn't he just the cutest?

I would post an adorable picture of Hannah, except that she refuses to smile for the camera right now. And we're going to attempt Christmas card pictures this weekend. And I will bribe her with suckers.

-2-

In case you missed it, check out yesterday's post about my friend's new book. And if you want to buy it, do it through my link on the side and I get MONEY! 

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I'm heading out tonight shortly after Ted gets home for a weekend retreat. Oh how I need this. It's at a retreat center in town so to save money I'm coming back home to sleep. But other than that I'll be there all weekend. It's with a Father of Mercy. I've heard a few others speak in years past and have been incredibly challenged and moved by them. I'm expecting this weekend to be no different. It should be a great time to get my heart and mind in order before Advent begins. There's so much to do in the next month and I'm already getting overwhelmed thinking of it. I want to spend the weekend checking off nice little boxes on my to-do list and it's going to be hard for me to instead shut myself down and just spend time with Jesus.

Would you please pray for me? Pray that I will be refreshed and renewed by this retreat so that I may better serve my family when I am finished. And that I don't miss these two too much.

And if you have any prayer intentions that I can pray for you, please let me know!

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There is a lot of down time built into the retreat schedule. I keep saying things to Ted like, "Well the first talk doesn't start until 11:00. So I could just skip Mass Saturday and stay home until the first talk so I can help with the kids." At which time he reminds that this is a retreat and I'm not supposed to just show up for the bare minimum and then rush back home to make supper. I'm supposed to, ya know, retreat. Thanks goodness for my super smart husband.

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Hey check us out. Beautiful lake. Sweet husband. Notice anything missing from this picture?

That's right, kids! Last weekend some friends watched the kiddos for a few hours so we could go on our annual trip to the lake. Sure, it wasn't a secluded cabin in the woods for the entire weekend, but it was a nice little break and a chance to be together. Every time we manage to get away together we realize how much we'd been needing the break. We've got to figure out a way to make it more than a once in a blue moon thing. Sometimes I feel like we're just two people who happen to be raising the same kids. Just co managers of the household who take turns doing dishes and bath time routines. But when we get away I remember that we're actually a married couple. Who like each other and like spending time together. And who had a whole life before these kids came along.

But yes, we do end up just talking about said kids for the majority of the time. I also had a chance to get started on this book and am really loving it. Hopefully I'll get to finish it on the retreat this weekend.

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Have you signed the Pope's birthday card yet? Get to it!

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Go read this. And buy this book if you're one of the five people who haven't already. And have a great weekend.

My Friend Knows How to Feast!

My friend wrote a book. It's really good. You should buy it.

And that's the end of this blog post.

Ok, ok. Just a little more. I'm sick and really, really tired and want to go to bed five hours ago. But I just can't do it until I sing the praises of Haley and her book. Haley was one of my first friends when we moved to Florida and she's still one of my closest. Such a beautiful soul. A great writer, devout Catholic (a convert, the best kind!), wonderful mama, and all around fun gal. We may or may not have stayed up way too late last night at a ladies night out and I may or may not have had several glasses of wine and I may or may not have called her a name that I can't retype here on this blog. In love. It was all in love.

I really do love Haley.

And her book is awesome. I've learned so much from her friendship about living liturgically and what that really means. This book is a great example. I've also been privy to Haley's cooking when she's had us over for dinner to feast on the rooster that our husband's slaughtered together. Among other, less gruesome, times. She's a good cook. And I don't think she'd be offended by my saying that her husband's even better. They're a pretty terrific team.

So if you'd like a cookbook that has REAL FOOD recipes (most of which are gluten free, yay for me), reflections on living liturgically, and facts about some awesome saints then you should buy her book. It's an ebook that comes to you via email as a PDF and she's selling it for only $4.99 through Thanksgiving (at which time it will go up to $375 so act quickly). And because Haley is super sweet and generous she offered to let me put an affiliate link on ye olde blog and make a few pennies. Gotta finance my July adventure somehow, ya know.

So if you do buy it, buy it through my link at the top of the sidebar and I'll be super grateful. ------>

And this is the real end of this blog post.

Why I Love (and Hate) Blogging

I think it's pretty obvious that I really like blogging. I wouldn't have spent the last four years pouring my heart and head into this thing if I didn't enjoy it. I do. My blog helps me process how I feel about certain things. It helps me connect with some really amazing people. It serves as my baby book and a way to share stories and pictures with family who live far away. I like to believe that sometimes it's a tool for evangelization. It allows me to help families with questions about speech therapy. And the countless emails I've received from readers with questions related to infertility assure me that it still serves as a beacon of hope or a source of information for those struggling to conceive.

It's all of those things. But it's also a huge time sucker. And an energy drainer. And, if I'm honest, sometimes a chore.

I've never been a secretive or private person. I've always worn my heart of my sleeve and said what I think and not really cared who heard it or what anyone thought. And sometimes that can be a really wonderful quality. Like when Ted and I give the NFP talks on the Engaged Encounter weekends. Staring at a room full of college students and young adults looking at us like we have a third eye or horns coming out of our head. But we're open and totally honest with them when we tell them things they might not know about birth control. When we open their eyes to the fact that it increases your risk for breast cancer and doesn't actually treat a woman's gynecological issues. We're open when we expose our sex life for strangers at the hope of helping them make good decisions with their own sexuality.

And we're able to do this because they are just that, strangers. We don't know that they're all already living together. We don't know that every woman in the room is likely already on the pill. We don't know that they think we're total nut jobs.  We realize these things are pretty likely, but we don't know them. And that helps us present the information in a factual way. Without worrying that we're going to personally offend someone or make anyone feel singled out. Am I making any sense?

That's the way it is with blogging. I write. You read. I don't even know who you are. Sure, I know a lot of my followers and are friends with them either in real life or online. I know that certain family members read regularly even though they rarely say anything. But other than that, I have no idea who reads these words. And I don't know what you think about them. I have family members who know a lot about me from reading these posts over the years, but I know next to nothing about them. They don't blog. We don't talk. We live days away. So it goes. There are college friends reading that I haven't talked to in years. Years! They know so much about me. So much about Hannah and Paul and what is going on in our lives right now. But I can't even remember how many kids they have. Or what their names are. Or what state they're even living in. Because blogging is inherently one sided, no matter how many comments I respond to or facebook friends I have.

And I guess, right now, that kinda bothers me. It bothers me to know so little about certain people who know so much about me. And it bothers me that blogging can sometimes feel like something I need to do rather than something I want to do. I'm not writing in the hopes of coming up with a solution. (Unless of course everyone I care about who is reading this would also start a blog and/or send me a lengthy email about everything that is happening in their life and their views on major moral issues as well as someone creating a computer program that could just read my thoughts so I didn't have to ever sit down and type them out. That would be a doable solution.) And I'm not making any sort of grand blogging exit announcement or fishing for comments begging me to stay. Just....bein' honest.

I like telling people about my life. I like recording it so I can go back and read about it whenever I want. I like the many true and authentic friendships I've forged through blogging and the people I've helped and the people who've helped me. For now, that's still enough to keep me hanging on.

So I'll keep writing. And extolling the virtues of the Catholic Church and complaining about the vices of the culture of death. And handing out personal information about our lives like candy to strangers on Halloween. For now.

I'm not addicted. I can quit any time. Promise ;)

Five Favorites (With a Really Crappy Giveaway!)

Joining Hallie again. If I was allowed to have a sixth favorite, it would be the song she has in her number one spot. So beautiful. I've been listening to it on repeat all week. But I'm not allowed to have six favorites, so I'll just get started with my five below.

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This post by Jenny. Every post by Jenny actually, but especially that one. She has such a knack for writing about living out your pro-life values in an anti-life world. And a knack for writing in general.

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The person who can solve this current parenting dilemma for me. YOU will be my favorite! How do I get Hannah to stop biting her nails and chewing on her fingers? How? I need to know!

"Smile Hannah." "No. I want to be siwwy. Yite dis."

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Sweet Potato Fries from a bag. I love all sweet potato fries, but the kind that I don't have to cut up and stand at the stove frying are the best. It goes against my attitude of "don't spend money on something you can make yourself" and I don't care one bit because they are fast and delicious and oh my goodness I just need food in my body right this second! And when you are making dinner and realize you forgot to make a side....sweet potato fries. When you've run out of options for a quick lunch......sweet potato fries. When the baby wants your food and wont stop grabbing it out of your hands.....broken up sweet potato fries to the rescue.

I buy the giant bag at Costco but I've seen them at Walmart too.

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This homemade recipe for remoulade. Having been dairy free for the better part of three years now, I can tell you that the desire to dip stuff into something creamy does not go away. I just want ranch!!! Or cream cheese!!! Or queso!! So when I remembered that remoulade is mayonnaise based, I whipped up a batch and starting dipping. Mostly sweet potato fries.

I had never heard of remoulade until we moved to Mississippi. On my first day of training at my new job I went out to lunch with a bunch of beautiful, young, Southern gals with thick accents. They looked at me like I was a freak show when I started eating my food before every.single.person had their food in front of them too. Because apparently that's a thing in the South and it's most certainly not a thing in the North. Not when there are more than a dozen people at the table. And food is being brought out one dish at a time. And we only have a thirty minute lunch break.  But I noted their stares and agape mouths and put my fork down and sat and watched my food get cold like everyone else. So later when I asked, "What's remoulade??"they had no trouble just writing me off as a rude Northern weirdo who didn't know her Cajun food.  I think I put my elbows on the table too. They, on the other hand, did not.

Unrelated picture of Paul. Also being "siwwy"

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This book on potty training. Oh Crap Potty Training by Jamie Glowacki. I read it months ago and totally forgot that the author offered to do a giveaway for readers of this here blog. I pulled it back out this week because we are going to start night training Hannah now and I wanted to refresh myself with her tips. For us, her method worked like a charm. I appreciated the wealth of informaiton and the tips on common mistakes. I totally would have said, "it's ok!" every time Hannah had an accident when, really, it's not ok. That's why we're teaching you to use the potty! So instead I followed her advice of just stating the obvious ("You peed on the floor.") and reminding her what to do ("We pee in the potty now.")

I liked that she doesn't use food as a reinforcer and found that to be super successful for Hannah. It was a much more logical approach than the sticker charts and candy and it worked for us.

The most helpful was her guidelines for determining if your child is ready. I wish I had read it sooner because Hannah was definitely ready a few months before we finally started. And if we had read it earlier I would have had a potty trained toddler before the new baby arrived and wouldn't have been messing with potty training while caring for a five week old.

If you want to win it, enter below! And if you don't win, you should just buy it. It was actually a fun read and I read it cover to cover in one sitting and then went back to digest the important parts. Her language is pretty rough, but I kind of enjoyed it. She did use some curse words as a warning for those who may not like that. And God's name in vain a few times, which made me sad. Because there are so many better ways to say things without stooping to that level, ya know?

But overall, good book. Super helpful. Go win it! a Rafflecopter giveaway

Quick Takes: Three Great Days and Some Quotes

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Gratuitous Halloween Recap:

My kids were so dang cute. I wish the jacket belonged to us so I could dress Paul in it all winter. And the side pony, I'm tempted to have it make a weekly appearance.

We hosted a party with a few friends and then ventured to a nearby church from a Trunk or Treat. Hannah was in heaven. She overcame her shyness to say "titt or teat" (wow, I did't realize how bad that would look until I typed it out....) and "daint you" to every warm body holding candy. And although she was majorly pumped by the party and the dressing up and the free candy, nothing could have prepared her for the excitement of passing out candy to the strangers that came to our door. 

For Hannah, the after party was even better than the main event.

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I'm really glad I have another year before I need to hit All Saints Day hard. We didn't do much this year since Hannah's not quite old enough to understand. And I had to work. But this year served as a good wake up call as to how hard I'm going to need to work to help my kids get excited about All Saints Day in the future. Following up a day filled with parties and candy and dressing up with....."We get to go to Mass tonight!" probably isn't going to cut it.

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We did make a small alter to celebrate.

All the importants are represented. Noah and Miriam and saints of the Old Testament. St. Paul, St. Joseph, and Our Lady bring in the New. St. Rose Philippine Duchesne and a collection of boy Saints and holy cards for the early and modern Church. And Sts. Melissa and Doug give it a nice finishing touch.

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Other than our collection of Saints, we spent All Saints Day listening to this song:

Hannah asked for it again and again and I was happy to oblige.

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We failed big time with Al Souls Day yesterday. (I started these on Friday....finishing them on Sunday.) But if everything goes according to plan today we are going to go for a walk and pray in the cemetery. The weather is beautiful and there are several big statues that I know Hannah will love. I'm really looking forward to it.

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Some Hannah quotes:

While reading this beautiful version of Noah's Ark and pointing to what might be an onyx.

H: What's that?

Ted: Well, I'm not exactly sure. It's from Africa. Africa is a different continent. Uh, you don't know what a continent is. It's an animal from a country that is really, really far away.

H: 

Ted:

H: It's pony?

Just go with pony, dad.

While watching me put on my robe.

H: Mommy that's a pretty dress?

Me: It's called a robe.

H: Oh. You're awfully cute.

Me: Awe, thanks Hannah!

H: I want to wear a rose like you.

-7-

Some quotes from Paul.

"mama"

And hearing that word from this boy is likely the sweetest thing I've ever heard. I have pretty stringent criteria for what I consider a first word. Not just babbling. Must be directed toward the person/object. Most be obvious that he's actually referring to person/object. Must say it immediately upon seeing person/object for the first time. Etc.

I waited three days to say for sure. He's not even eight months old so I was very skeptical. But he's saying it. For real. He's saying "mama".

Parenthood is awesome.

Happy Sunday!