Saturday, January 4, 2014

The Undocumented Year

In the past two weeks I've wanted to write about a dozen blog posts. Recaps of 2013. Photo updates of our exhausting 11 day trip to Missouri. Reflections on our annual New Year's retreat. I've wanted to blog about meeting my sister's fiance and tell the world how happy I am for her. And lament the fact that our best friends moved away and I'm sad and lonely without them. Or post any of the adorable quotes that are coming out of Hannah's mouth on a daily basis. (I want you to STAY wif me and BE wif me while you PLAY wif me! Just one, I couldn't help it.)

But instead, I'm just going to write this one.

I'm done with social media. Done with facebook and done with blogging. At least, I need to be done with it. I need a break.

As Ted and I discussed our goals and plans for 2014, I realized that none of them have anything to do with my "online presence" or with blogging or with reading status updates. Shocking, I know. What I do want to do is to read more with Hannah. Stretch her mind and her attention span by finding more and better books all the time. Make reading a favorite activity that we do throughout the day instead of mostly at bedtime.

I want to focus on disciplining Paul, rather than just carrying him around so he won't get into trouble. I want to make the difficult effort to teach him right from wrong at his adorable young age so that our family can live more peacefully with a baby who is learning to listen.

I want to read. Real books. From real authors. Not 800 words on a blog post that I will forget as quickly as I exit out of the tab.

I want to strengthen the friendships I've been fortunate to make here in Florida. I want to make time for more coffee dates and ladies nights instead of stretching myself crazy stupid thin trying to keep up with every friend I've ever had by commenting on pictures of their kids on facebook.

I want to get better at meal planning and budgeting instead of just throwing food on the table because I was too lazy to do anything during the kids' naps except zone out on the internet.

I want to finally, finally start getting up before the kids in the morning. Sip my coffee in peace and talk to Jesus before I check my email. Rather than roll out of bed bleary eyed and exhausted because I stayed up way too late wasting time on the stupid internet.

And it's just glaringly obvious to me that none of those things are possible as long as I'm living a distracted life. A life spent with one foot in the real world and one foot planted firmly in the endless void of social media. Not to mention the fact that I just don't have time anymore. Not with two kids and a super fun husband and three part time jobs and enough food allergies to make cooking a full time job in itself.

So, I'm giving it up. For a year. A full freaking year. 2014 shall hence be known as my undocumented year. My year of living in, and only in, the real world. It's going to be hard. Really stinking super hard. But that 's just more evidence that I need to do it. And while I may post a picture of the kids on facebook from time to time (it's the only place I can keep track of their monthly baby photos!), read a few of my favorite blogs if I'm really needing a pick-me-up, or do a quick blog post if anything super exciting needs to be announced, as of now I'm signing off.  There are plenty of other blogs out there for you to read. Plenty of other people for you to keep up with on facebook. If you're going to miss me, then maybe you could give me a call sometime? Or plan a Skype date? Or hop on a plane and come visit because the beach is awesome and we don't get snow here.

It's going to take some time for me to get used to this. I do some of my best thinking on this blog. Heck, I even thought through this entire resolution by writing this post in my head. And I have no idea what I'll decide to do at the end of this year. But I've gotta give it a shot.

So here goes. I'm signing off. And giving my honest to goodness all out effort to live this year for them.